Urgent Guidance: How to Tactfully Navigate Dinner Blessings

UPDATE: Miss Manners has provided urgent advice on handling two pressing social dilemmas that many families face during gatherings.

In a recent column, she addresses the growing discomfort surrounding traditional dinner blessings. A reader expressed concern about the practice of holding hands during prayer, which they find unsanitary after washing their hands for meals. The reader seeks advice on how to tactfully avoid this awkward situation while still respecting family customs.

Immediate Impact: This dilemma resonates with many who grapple with etiquette in social settings, especially in light of rising health awareness post-pandemic.

Miss Manners suggests a clever workaround: wash your hands at the designated time, participate in the prayer holding hands, then excuse yourself just before the meal. This allows for a discreet second hand wash, ensuring personal hygiene without offending guests.

Additional Context: The etiquette expert emphasizes that while the initial washing may seem negated by holding hands, the solution lies in maintaining politeness while prioritizing one’s own comfort.

In another scenario, Miss Manners tackles family dynamics, addressing a reader’s frustration over their husband’s adult sons not contributing during family meals. The reader, who drives an extensive 3,300-mile round trip twice a year for birthdays, notes the sons have yet to offer to pay for any meals despite their financial stability.

Why This Matters: Many readers can relate to the complexities of family expectations and financial responsibilities, especially during family gatherings.

Miss Manners advises addressing the issue directly with the husband, highlighting the importance of open communication in navigating family relationships. She warns that while honesty is crucial, tact and consideration should guide the conversation.

What’s Next: Readers facing similar situations are encouraged to reflect on their family dynamics and consider how to approach these sensitive topics.

Miss Manners’ insights remind us that navigating social etiquette is not just about rules, but about maintaining harmony within our families while respecting personal boundaries.

For more personalized advice, readers can submit their questions directly to Miss Manners through her website or email.

Stay tuned for more updates on social etiquette as Miss Manners continues to address modern dilemmas in today’s complex social landscape.