Navigating Holiday Cards Amid Divorce: A Unique Approach

As the holiday season approaches, many individuals face challenges in crafting their annual Christmas cards. For one mother, her situation is particularly complex due to her impending divorce after 25 years of marriage. With the finalization of her divorce scheduled for less than a month after Christmas, she is rethinking how to approach her holiday greetings.

The woman, who is transitioning back to her maiden name, is uncertain about how to present her new family dynamic in a way that feels authentic yet respectful. She shares four children—and even a cat—who remain central to her holiday celebrations. This year, she seeks a clever or heartfelt way to communicate this change to friends and family without appearing disingenuous.

In response to her inquiry, Eric Thomas, a columnist known for his insightful advice, suggests several options for wording that could convey her new family identity. One potential phrasing is, “There’s a new name, and a new family arrangement, but the warm wishes are the same.” This approach maintains a sense of continuity while acknowledging the changes.

Another option draws on seasonal themes: “This holiday, we’re moving into a new season of life, so you’ll see a different name on the return address, but know that my love for you lasts year-round.” For those seeking a lighter touch, Thomas humorously proposes, “Is it regifting when Santa brings you your maiden name for Christmas?”

Including a personal touch, such as a photo of herself with her children and their cat, could further enhance the card’s message. Signing the card with her maiden name allows recipients to infer the changes without explicitly stating them, thereby creating an opportunity for direct conversation if they wish to inquire further.

While some may advise against announcing a divorce in holiday greetings due to its sensitive nature, Thomas emphasizes that the card represents the sender’s life and experiences. Holiday cards often reflect the full spectrum of life events—joys, challenges, and everything in between.

Readers are invited to contribute their own creative ideas or share experiences related to holiday greetings that announce divorce, as Thomas plans to feature these contributions in a future column. Those interested can reach out to him at [email protected] or send correspondence to P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110.

Ultimately, as families evolve, so too do their ways of celebrating and communicating. Embracing change during the holiday season can be a reflection of resilience and adaptation, allowing families to maintain connections even through transitions.